Touch starvation

The other side of loneliness, when dreaming about a hug becomes physically uncomfortable. Touch starvation isn’t merely a lack of sensual touch, but of all forms of physical contact. Symptoms of touch starvation can include feelings of anxiety, depression, stress and trouble sleeping. We’d like friends who are into hugs, but not everyone enjoys touch and building a social circle takes time, so in the meantime, we need to look towards compensating, for which we have several alternatives.

If you have the funds, book massages. The classical kind, not the happy ending kind. Someone working on your back or shoulders does wonders for the mind. If not, yoga courses and sports. A sport allowing contact does double duty. Dancing if you’re a pacifist, jiu-jitsu and judo if you’re martially inclined, heavy metal concerts in the pit if war and desolation are your absolutes.

Interestingly, some studies indicate that having verbal contact with people lessens touch starvation, despite there being no physical touch. That’s on us being social beings.

My personal favourite, animals. Petting them provokes a similar release of oxytocin than petting hugging humans, even with cats that were sociopathic criminals in a past life like mine. If you can’t get one yourself, take a gander at a local animal shelter. Many look for volunteers, and even better, allow to come by to pet animals so animals get a presence too.

On the inanimate side of things, consider body pillows. Without the anime naked pretty lady or gentleman on it. Hugging it tight when going to bed has its effect, as do weighed blankets.

Finally, heat apparently has a soothing quality to counteract touch starvation, like hot showers or holding a cup of warm cocoa.

Like the need for love, the lack of touch can’t be fully suppressed without actual human touch, but it can be reduced to a manageable level.